So, since Ashton doesn’t like using his ghetto computer speakers, he uses a pair of headphones with an unnecessarily long 12-foot cable that Dad gave him. He woke up the other day only to find that the aforementioned headphones were missing from his computer and everything on his desk was shuffled all over the place. He looked frantically until he saw a cable stretched across the dining room floor.
Ashton leaned over and gave it a tug, but it wouldn’t budge. When he investigated the matter, he found Teddy lying under the table, completely wrapped in headphone wires. After a few more tugs, Teddy finally got up and walked off…with the cable and headphones dragging across the floor behind her. Ashton desperately tried to unwrap her, which is no easy task, seeing as how Teddy is old and decrepit and can barely move her limbs as it is, until he got to the root of the source. And by “source”, I mean Teddy’s butt. And by “root”, I mean the poop jammed in her butt that was sticking to the headphone cable. Huzzah!
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